Breaking News: Ahead of his impeachment as U.S.
President, (about which he tweeted, "Only three guys
have ever been impeached, so it's something I can be
proud of!"), Donald Trump, in today launching his
new American Space Force, has instructed his
attorney Rudy Giuliano to immediately organise
that Trump's name be changed by deed poll to
Flash Gordon. Leader Of The House Nancy
Pelosi, who grimly applauded Mr Trump's decision,
later said, "It makes about as much sense as anything else
he's done, let's face it. He's telling everyone who'll listen that he's bought a house on Tracy Island and already taken Thunderbird 3 for a spin and that he wants to build a wall on Mars and charge the Martians for it".
"When you tune your radio to receive only "White Noise"
at least 10% of that "noise" is coming directly from the Cosmos".
Space News: December 2019:Most of the world may not have experienced a white Christmas this year, but ‘cosmic snowflakes’ were recently spotted in space by Nasa's Spitzer telescope, proving a long suspected theory that life as we know it on Earth is under threat from these Snowflakes. "They are everywhere", said one NASA spokesman. "One of them turned up at my daughter's school fireworks display claiming his pet hamster had died of a heart attack because of the bangs. Another one complained that the fireworks were actually happening at night when the sudden lights from the rockets reflected off his bald head and made him look "not his best". There is historical evidence that they have been among us for hundreds of years. A recent historical document stated that one of William Wallace's generals refused to fight at the Battle Of Stirling, because he had broken a nail, had forgotten to floss, and furthermore, "did'nt like the way the King of England Edward Longshanks was looking at him. and that the blue woad clashed with his skin tone, which for him was the last straw".
A.I. News: Robot butler goes nuts. "All I did was ask for my usual coffee, one part Arabica, one part Gojo, one part Columbian, with a dash of Wal-Mart instant, two parts fat free Soya, one part whole milk, a dash of vanilla, two parts a dash of hazlenut, all at exactly 74 degrees, at an angle of 36 degrees, with one part cinammon sprinkle, and three parts low fat chocolate flavour chocolate topping lo-cal, and the bloody thing called me a son-of-a-bitch and went berserk", the owner explained through the door of a broom cupboard in his basement. "I'll be drinking tea from now on, pal ".
Reuters News Just In:
The last "Extinction
gets eaten by the last
Climate Crisis News: A cow, whose name has been
changed to Bessie, to protect her anonimity, explained what happened. "I was hanging around in the corner of my field, chewing the cud as you do, minding my own bit of grass, when suddenly this hysterical bloke jumped out from behind a bush and screamed at me for causing global warming by farting. I was so surprised I let one off and unfortunately covered this guy's Jesus sandals in a large cow-pat. Look, I'm already a vegetarian and I don't drive a car, so I think I'm doing my bit.
Just ask Greta. Fancy a drink of milk?".
U.K. December, 2019 General Election:
Revealed today. After being trounced at the British election, Jeremy Corbyn immediately announced plans to defect back to Russia. However, speaking over his gold-plated telephone from his Beluga caviar-filled jacuzzi on his private jet, Russian Premiere Vladimir Putin explained why this will never be a reality, "Nah, he's too left-wing for us. Leave him to dig in his carrots on his allotment, and he can imagine he's in a Gulag in Siberia and it's still 1919...or whatever fantasy suits him next. Donald's here in the jacuzzi with me. Wanna speak to him? No? Well, catch him on Twitter. Dasvidaniya, baby"
Royal News: Harry and Meghan
to relocate to Antarctica, to play
themselves, in a palace funded remake
of "Nanook Of The North".
"It is one's favourite piece of cinema", said
the Queen through her company Palace
Productions, "and one suddenly got this urge,
as one does, to see them in it".
...for many decades, Hollywood got us used to the idea of the robot...since the real Day Of The Robot is almost upon us...below are new tracks to help explore an idea you will all have to get used to...". Jon Sorensen
...a beautiful, recently conceived short film, designed, photographed, directed and executed by Scottish born visual effects supervisor Steven Begg, with suit costuming by Scots-born designer Christine Overs. Steve's work is always truly wonderful and technically immaculate.
I love the spirituality in this piece.